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Friday, September 9, 2011

The Time Dimension - Water/Wine

Let’s take a look at the man that carries the dominate water or wine trait (remember we are talking about them subjectively in a generalized format as they are right now) so see if you can picture a guy you may know past or present that are like this and then start looking at other men and you will notice more often than not a lot of them will carry one of these trait's to help deal with his Time battle. So where we are going today some may know this already but it is only one part to the total picture I’m painting.

 Let’s take a deep look at Mr. Water

It’s all about emotional diversification for this guy. He doesn’t want to put all of his nuts in one tree. Most likely it comes from being traumatically hurt in the past. So he samples. He keeps women on the side. He flirts heavily and leads girls on. Literally has no shame. What is important is the understanding behind WHY he does/doing these things. Many people make the mistake and assume that men  who we call water date many girls at the same time in order to affirm his stature as a player or ladies man. Or is he simply trying to figure out which one is the PERFECT girl.
And sorry to say they’re WRONG!!!!!

 In fact Mr. Water does NOT really even CARE about finding ONE perfect girl. He can totally give a rat’s ass.  He is getting the total package and total fulfillment by getting certain types of value and emotions from the combination of women he has chosen to surround himself with without having to actually emotionally commit to any one woman.
And, he is simply thinking “I’m just having fun for a few years and then I’ll find someone to settle down with later”. I got plenty of TIME!

And surprisingly – of course over time, even if they find that perfect one, his “Halle Berry” they might still date others who are not as good as her just to have some symbolice of what his world used to be like! Hold and squeeze your man too tight and he will revert to what you may call going from wine to water. THINK ABOUT IT! Many of you are guilty of and have been the cause of why a lot of men think and live this way now…FACT! Ya’ll Know I’m Right!!!!

I’m going to generalize a little bit just for the sake of doing so as some are not yet really grasping what I’m writing so here goes – and this isn’t the case 100% of the time, but in general Mr. Water has suffered some kind of romantic loss or trauma relating to a woman where he has felt cheated and betrayed by a woman in his past. It can go as deep as this trauma being caused by his mother, sister, aunt, grandmother.
Mr. Water is sampling multiple girls to feel significance – to be validated as a desirable, attractive man. And this is VERY important to men. even though many won’t admit to it, It’s about the male ego the only way to heal past pains in Mr. Water’s mind is to gain as much admiration from as many women as possible. 

I met this guy recently and to say the least I was amazed by what he told me about his current life at that time. He was dating this girl for well over 3 years and he wanted to marry her in fact. But what ended up happening was totally way out of left field, his child’s mother had passed away and while he was at his child’s mother’s funeral his soon to be fiance was sleeping with another man in their bed and he came home and caught them. "NO BULLSHIT" At that point I was heartbroken for the guy.  The apathy I had for him at that moment changed as rapidly as it came when he said and I quote “I stopped working no BS, took a 6 month vacation moved to NYC all set out to date as many women as I could in those 6 months”, (sick right?) and from what I gathered from him during our conversation he did just that and accomplished his goal. On average he was telling me, he dated 8 to 10 women at the same time and all were oblivious to this fact that “wake up boo boo u not the only one”.  He did all the right things for all of them, but at the end of the day they all thought they were the only one. Yes he SERIOUSLY dated on a full time basis, a professional dater if you want to call it that, don’t know how he did it, really didn’t care but I immediately identified him as a man who at one point was wine, trauma came and with it the dominate water trait and all we did was have a general 10 - 15 min conversation. So I didn’t know WHO to feel apathy for at that moment, him or the girls.

Now here’s the kicker to his story, these unsuspecting girls who were unaware of this specific trait in men or even some of the information u have now. or even knew there was a trait. May have actually thought of him as “Mr. Wine” (although they wouldn’t know the correct terminology) because each had no idea about all the others and found themselves getting burned, and it would be safe to assume that every one of those women assumed all the attention was focused on her. End Result, was he said in one move he broke up with each one simultaneously moved back to his home town and returned to work and he is still single. So now somewhere in NYC there are roughly 8 to 10 women that he just destroyed their mental reality and are now broken hearted and alone again I suppose,  “make’s you kinda feel bad”. I know a girl who is going through that right now.   I really and truly hope I am able to help some of you to identify the subtle clues so you can really figure out the guys who are really Water. Because as I said before Mr. Water will present an image to girls that they are actually Wine.  So who's to blame in this situation? The guy for just doing what men with that trait do or The girl for being clueless to the type of man she was dealing with?

 I wonder if this has happened to you or someone you may know…JustAThought!!!

I would not doubt that some of you have already started looking at men a little differently now, what’s hilarious to me is that, you doing it would not be a shock to me because I know as women readers specifically I’m a man so you are going to question everything I write….I’d at least hope that is what you are doing, if not I wouldn’t have a reason to keep writing…but anyways

These men are indeed extremely powerful, and emotionally unstable. As women I need you to be very mindful and you have to be especially careful of them. It’s best to know a guy is Water and treat him exactly that way or I can almost guarantee you will be the victim each and  every time, (Tired of being alone I just gave you one key to stop the madness, Hope your paying attention) This is going to be a surefire way to grab his real attention, if his attention is what you actually want at all. This man can be tamed! (I will go into detailed strategies as we progress forward)

Please take this very seriously, do not try and implement any of this little information you now know too your advantage on your man/men you are currently dealing with. Try to have a little bit of tact, but most importantly patience do not try and mold them to what you want, it will go horribly bad this I promise you and it will ‘GO BAD’. It is still too early to effectively implement what I have said thus far properly and get the best result with the least amount of effort  Men have 3 life battle’s they fight daily, (reference the title of this blog) and 2 simple but yet very dynamic ways of dealing with each individual battle being the traits he inherent are extreme opposites of each other and right now I’m only talking about 1 Battle and its 2 traits at the moment, so if you think you can bake a cake and don’t know the ingredients but you try and bake one anyway without the full recipe “NO slow down boo boo” we all know it will be a horrible disaster. So please do not try to convert any men. YET!!!!!!LOL
Let’s do a quick recap of Mr. Water

• Does not care about finding the one perfect woman he is perfectly satisfied and getting what he needs from a combination of girls
• He will have multiple girls to feel significance, to feel validated and wanted Give that old Ego a boost

• He’s not always sleeping with all of the women on his team, this is very important for you to remember it is going to come back up as we keep going forward

• He has sophisticated almost unrealistic strategies to keep the woman he really does not want emotionally, he keeps her around for her one quality or skill.  Part of the team but currently they are the bench warmers think of him as Head basketball coach and the women, are players on his basketball team. ARE YOU PART OF YOUR MAN’S STARTING 5?

• Water can be turned into wine if you have the right skills and you have the right mindset.

Let’s take a deep look at Wine:

So while Water is indifferent to really finding that one “perfect girl” Mr. Wine DOES have getting the perfect girl in the back of his head.  However – it’s not that he finds the perfect girl and then decides to stick with her, oh no no – it’s that he is trying to FIX her. He sees that she has potential. The girl simply has POTENTIAL to be perfect for him. And that is what keeps him devoted to her. He will usually have ONE THING and only that one thing he is trying to “change” so that she becomes perfect for him. But here’s the kick in the ass – once he does manage to get her to change that one thing – his interest level in her usually goes right out the window along with the relationship. Because for him – just the feeling of having the challenge of something to “fix” is what keeps him motivated, interested and attracted. That will play heavily into our in depth plan for attracting Wine instead of water.
Mr. Wine makes GREAT boyfriends – that much is certainly true. And well, Mr. Water can be a lot of fun, but if you want to change Mr. Water into Mr. Wine, that is going to take a completely different plan and course of action - which we’ll discuss later.  What’s even more interesting to the point of almost being borderline psychotic is that Mr. Wine will stay with a girl until he is CONVINCED she is not the one. The key to all this is him being convinced. He usually has to be convinced BEYOND A SHADOW OF A DOUBT that she is not that one. And if he is convinced, he will without any hesitation move on to the next girl, sometimes directly into a Mr. Water phase in between them, to settle his urges and re-adjust.

And Mr. Wine has also suffered some kind of romantic or traumatic loss in his dealings with women – but does NOT feel cheated or betrayed, either he had to move away from a girl he really loved, or lost her in some other way – OR and this is a big one! bombshell dropping –he actually blames HIMSELF for the loss . And what he is doing by BEING Mr. Wine is he is somehow proving to himself that he CAN create the perfect relationship by helping a girl step into a role that isn’t necessarily natural for her. It’s simply his way of feeling he’s supportive, important, and needed. Those are the emotions that drive him and cause him to be exactly the way he is.
So let us recap Wine:

• He wants to have the perfect woman – but is really looking for POTENTIAL in the one woman he is with
• He more than likely tends to only date one girl at one time and puts all his time and energy in just that one girl

• He would rather have fewer relationships over his lifetime, but longer relationships is what he’s after
• In most cases, if he is successful in FIXING you, he loses interest (no more fun)

• He will stick by your side devotedly unless he is CONVINCED you’re not the one, then moves on quickly to the next girl

Does anybody have any question at this point?  Feel free to take this time to ask about anything you are not quite sure about.  I don’t bite! Your question may help other readers with the same questions or idea all reach a general understanding.

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